My Friend Asked Me Why I Stopped Writing. So I Told Her …

In short, I don’t feel like writing.

Writing about travel is boring me. Unless I find myself plonked in the middle of the Amazon or living under the sea in King Triton’s kingdom, the majority of my travel experiences aren’t unique or mind-blowing to readers.

palace

You can find just the same information on everyone else’s travel blog; There is no off-the-beaten path. My unique, personal experience with whatever I visit or wander through is exactly that – personal – and who really cares about hearing that?

I’m also pretty settled into life as an expat here too. I know how to get around, my apartment feels like home, and I’m confident when it comes to attempting to communicate with someone in Korean. (Even though my Korean’s still practically non-existent.) I’m not making as many mistakes with, y’know, trying to live here.

But I still have a lot of issues with this country that I’ve never seen written about on expat blogs before.

Whether I’m noticing them more because I’m living in quite a poor area right at the bottom of the country, away from the modernisation of Seoul, or if other bloggers just choose to remain ignorant and in their own expat bubble, I don’t know.

But I don’t want to turn this blog into a bitchfest. Especially about a place that pays me well, takes care of me, and has helped me meet some pretty cool people. So I don’t write about it.

Korea has given me something I’ve never experienced in my life until now: Financial stability.

At the age of 27, I can pay all my bills, pay my debt off, buy more than enough food to live on, have occasional nights out, make a trip across the country, and still have some money left in my back pocket at the end of each month.

This has never happened to me before.

Every job I’ve ever had has always brought about some kind of financial worry. I’ve either had to claim additional government benefits, move in with my parents, or had debt collectors knocking on my door.

Suddenly everything is stable and I can’t complain about anything. I’m grateful for every opportunity I’m given here and suddenly I see how privileged my life has become. I don’t worry as much about my own life which gives me the freedom to look out even more and see what else is going on.

In the last few months: Ferguson; Ukraine; Israel; Palestine; ISIS; Ebola; The suicide of the funnyman of our childhoods. And that’s just what the media chose to bring attention to.

I don’t know how to write about myself in such an indulgent way when the world is still falling apart. I live amongst Korea’s homophobia, racism, and sexism – Issues that are grand and vicious and rampant in this country that most expats overlook because of soju and noraebang and stationary that’s just too cute.

I want to write about it. But I don’t want to blog about it.

I considered shutting the blog down once and for all. I’m sick of writing just for me. I have a million thoughts to get down but I’m just sick of the sound of my own voice.

Maybe I’m not a writer anymore after all.

 

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6 thoughts on “My Friend Asked Me Why I Stopped Writing. So I Told Her …

  1. I know you don’t consider yourself a writer but I appreciated this in so many ways. I’m also here and struggling to deal with Korea sometimes. Maintaining positivity can become a struggle, you’re right. I hope you decide to get back into the thick of writing. This was a good read. Thanks for sharing.

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  2. There is so much to say about this but instead of writing a novel I will say I think we really are kindred spirits! I can’t wait to sit with you, I feel like there is so much we have to talk about. Korea has definitely been light and dark for me. In the end though I think we both know our time here will have been worth it even with all that we struggle with.

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  3. Ceri I’m sure that, even if you didn’t realize it, you have unique things to say about your travel experiences. Everyone has a different perspective, and I know yours is just as interesting. 🙂 As for Korea… oof. I know what you mean. But just because we make good money and have a decent, stable setup here doesn’t mean we should remain silent about the other issues Korea has. I tend to tread lightly about it on my blog for now lest my coworkers read it (I’ll be more open about it once I leave the country) but I’m always pretty vocal to my friends about how infuriating the racism, gender inequality, ideals, etc of this country are to me. Hopefully the inspiration comes back, just give it time… but don’t give up blogging or writing please! 🙂

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  4. Hi, I hope you’re doing well in Korea, hmm.. this is pretty much evident from your post. I have nothing so important to say here, but my humble request is please don’t stop writing. Please.. There are many people who are waiting for you to comeback (In writing) 🙂 Think of those, who spent little pleasant time in reading your articles – amidst of their busy life. Please do come back for their sake. Hoping to see you back. ( I am only of them) 🙂

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  5. You are most definitely a writer 🙂 Your beautifully-written posts about Mexico City are inspiring, passionate, and hopeful. I dream of moving there one day to become a teacher after I finish my nursing program. Unfortunately, the conversations I have with individuals in the Northeast part of the U.S. about living in Mexico City tend to focus on the negative; all the reasons why not to move there. Reading about your unique personal experiences only reaffirms that I can create my own in that beautiful city one day. Knowing that you lived there, loved it, formed meaningful friendships, and found that Mexico seeped into your blood resonates so much with me and the life I hope to have there as a teacher. Anytime, I engage in self-doubt ruminating over all the reasons not to move to D.F. and that I should be happy with my life here, I am quick to remember you and your blog. You are so courageous, intelligent, and authentic. Your blog offers insight and meaning that I would not be able to find anywhere else. Your blog reminds me to think about what I really want for my life and not what I think I should be doing… Thank you so much for being my source of hope and reflection.

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